As a person who espouses marketing for a living, it's clear to me that its sacrilege to put a poor product in the market. But mistakes do happen and poor, defective products get made and placed in the market. Sometimes they hurt others and the marketer/manufacturer has the choice of taking it out of the market and making amends for his mistake.The Woe:
But what if you were a parent? Can you recall your defective product – a child that has gone horribly wrong? And is it the child’s fault that it went wrong or was it yours? And then again was it the environmental context (society, culture, politics, etc.,) in which the child is reared? These are questions that are raised and left unanswered by Lionel Shriver in her Novel titled “We need to talk about Kevin” (2003).
But what if you were a parent? Can you recall your defective product – a child that has gone horribly wrong? And is it the child’s fault that it went wrong or was it yours? And then again was it the environmental context (society, culture, politics, etc.,) in which the child is reared? These are questions that are raised and left unanswered by Lionel Shriver in her Novel titled “We need to talk about Kevin” (2003).
The book:
The book is written in the form of a series of letters from the mother of 15 year old Kevin to her estranged husband, after the boy has been incarcerated in prison for killing 7 people in a Columbine type massacre. In these letters she explores herself, her aspirations, her marriage, the contrasting beliefs and attitudes of the two people in the marriage, how these differences affected their parenting as well as their marriage after they turn parents. She explores her own attitudes, values, thoughts and feelings with courageous honesty. From a larger perspective, she explores the issues of who gives up more when a couple become parents, what are the individuals perspective of the society they live in, how does the community view the mother, the father and the child? The letters unfold in a dramatic fashion, almost akin to a suspense thriller with a psychotic character as its central theme. At the end, the letters leave you with too many disturbing questions and very few ideas on how to resolve them.
The book is written in the form of a series of letters from the mother of 15 year old Kevin to her estranged husband, after the boy has been incarcerated in prison for killing 7 people in a Columbine type massacre. In these letters she explores herself, her aspirations, her marriage, the contrasting beliefs and attitudes of the two people in the marriage, how these differences affected their parenting as well as their marriage after they turn parents. She explores her own attitudes, values, thoughts and feelings with courageous honesty. From a larger perspective, she explores the issues of who gives up more when a couple become parents, what are the individuals perspective of the society they live in, how does the community view the mother, the father and the child? The letters unfold in a dramatic fashion, almost akin to a suspense thriller with a psychotic character as its central theme. At the end, the letters leave you with too many disturbing questions and very few ideas on how to resolve them.
My kneejerk reactions:
When I started reading the book, I felt that the letters were far too open, too candid and far too self deprecatory for it to be written to someone who could read it and respond to it. Just too unreal! At times it sounded like the narrator was desperately appealing to someone to tell her she was right or wrong and no one was coming forth with an explanation. At other times, she sounded like she was making excuses and everything else she said was just to absolve herself from the obvious monstrosity she had created - she was looking for sympathy. Several times I was left confused about whether the mother (narrator) is the monster or the offspring is. But I couldn’t put down the book for a second.
I couldn’t believe someone who could write all this to another person would not be able to work out the differences that led to the estrangement. As the narration climaxes, we know why she is forced to write and the answer is not pretty. By the time I got to the end of the book, I was so drained emotionally and mentally that it left me with a catch in the throat and cobwebs in my brain. For one who is predisposed to putting down a book when it gets too heavy for a shameless bout of weeping and sometimes even bawling, this book left me too stunned to respond.
When I started reading the book, I felt that the letters were far too open, too candid and far too self deprecatory for it to be written to someone who could read it and respond to it. Just too unreal! At times it sounded like the narrator was desperately appealing to someone to tell her she was right or wrong and no one was coming forth with an explanation. At other times, she sounded like she was making excuses and everything else she said was just to absolve herself from the obvious monstrosity she had created - she was looking for sympathy. Several times I was left confused about whether the mother (narrator) is the monster or the offspring is. But I couldn’t put down the book for a second.
I couldn’t believe someone who could write all this to another person would not be able to work out the differences that led to the estrangement. As the narration climaxes, we know why she is forced to write and the answer is not pretty. By the time I got to the end of the book, I was so drained emotionally and mentally that it left me with a catch in the throat and cobwebs in my brain. For one who is predisposed to putting down a book when it gets too heavy for a shameless bout of weeping and sometimes even bawling, this book left me too stunned to respond.
Hmmmm...
Those familiar with psychology would identify the character of Kevin as one that matches an extreme case of anti-social personality: Extremely intelligent, absolutely no attachments, psychotic - twisted thinking and highly rationalized responses. Psychologists would also agree that such cases are hard to diagnose and hard to cure. The nature-nurture debate can be made here with no conclusive answers, as usual. But as long as we know that one part of that equation, the nurture part is left to us, we are never going to feel free of guilt and self doubt.
While on the topic of nature and nurture, here's another title by Ken Follet that handles a similar issue: The Third Twin. He seems to be arguing the nurture angle which is a more popular view in todays world. Here's a link that handles the topic quite nicely http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/science/article5986239.ece.
Those familiar with psychology would identify the character of Kevin as one that matches an extreme case of anti-social personality: Extremely intelligent, absolutely no attachments, psychotic - twisted thinking and highly rationalized responses. Psychologists would also agree that such cases are hard to diagnose and hard to cure. The nature-nurture debate can be made here with no conclusive answers, as usual. But as long as we know that one part of that equation, the nurture part is left to us, we are never going to feel free of guilt and self doubt.
While on the topic of nature and nurture, here's another title by Ken Follet that handles a similar issue: The Third Twin. He seems to be arguing the nurture angle which is a more popular view in todays world. Here's a link that handles the topic quite nicely http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/science/article5986239.ece.
Although one might think that the book is relevant only in the American context, I would highly recommend it to anyone who is a parent or who might eventually be one. Simply Profound!!
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